June 14, 2010 – north of Bakersfield, CA

I’m mad at Los Angeles. What a missed opportunity. You see, the place could’ve been the Emerald City if things had been different. With its climate, lush vegetation, beaches, jagged mountains and ample plains—not to mention its rich history since it was settled—the place should be something like paradise. A few days there, though, revealed (in my opinion) a microcosm of American community problems. The city is so large you can spend two or three hours on one of its freeways just getting from one borough to another. Of course, the city is known for its traffic problem. But I was not prepared for the sheer volume of cars and trucks all trying to cram onto one road for miles and miles. Driving in LA is so frustrating that after getting caught in traffic once again and being unable to reach our destination (again), we decided we’d rather leave. I had hoped to see more in LA but simply ran out of patience. Plus the van is way too thirsty to be sitting in gridlock all day.

Another weird aspect of the town is the apparent gap between rich and poor. Or maybe it’s just that anyone there over 30 who has any money will broadcast it as glaringly as possible. Throw in severe gang violence, a failing education system, and a bankrupt government and you’ve got Los Angeles, CA.

On Monday we went to Malibu, where the sun was shining. Santa Monica beach, where we hung out the day before, seems to be in a setting that traps the clouds once they hit the coast. Malibu would be a pretty nice playground if you could get an in on one of those beachside houses. Up Sunset Blvd from the coast we saw more of the storied areas where our favorite celebrities hang around and hang their hats. I had hoped to get into Bel Air in particular to check out the homes of Beatles and other favorites, but traffic prevented it. Damn it. I brought up traffic again.

We also spent some nice time on southern beaches like Redondo and Manhattan and Hermosa, where the scene is lower-key. Those beaches and neighborhoods were more like San Diego, which we liked so much, except denser with people and homes and cars. The peak of our stay in LA was a house party we attended with a friend we met. Everyone there was our age and work as pages at Paramount. Those people were energetic and funny, great fun! Out of goodwill we brought a sack of beer and a beer bong we found in the van. Both of which proved wildly popular. At one point a partygoer became so excited she actually fell through the porch floor! Thankfully the ground was near and it only caused a thigh wound. Oh, and the people had a lemon tree by the porch that had lemons the size of softballs! Sure, there’s plenty to say about Beverly Hills and the lawns there that have had the hell manicured out of them. Yes, it’s special. But out of my experience, I’ll keep at least these three ideas with me re: Los Angeles: the lady who burst thru the floor, softball lemons, and traffic from hell.